We were driving back home and had to go through a road where there was major construction work going on. It was a two way road but since most of the road was under construction, we had to take turns to use the road.
While we waited for our turn the car from other side blinked lights at us. My husband noticed it and tried to figure out and realized that high beam was on and switched it off.
For some reason , the guy inside car continued to do mouth gestures and hand gestures – it was quite obvious that he was probably scolding or bad mouthing us.
I was starting to get annoyed. Yes, we made a mistake but it was literally 2km/hr road and the light was on by mistake and this does not require such exaggerated display of anger.
It was his – let us call him X- turn to pass us and he drove, came close to our window, with raised hands and an angry face and surely looked like someone about to give a peace of his mind by yelling and my husband said right away ‘sorry sir , I did it by mistake’
Me and rest of the folks in our car were taken back by surprise.
X was obviously shocked and probably never in his life experienced something like this and froze in that gesture for a good 30 seconds and his raised hand became limp.
Once his mind processed my husband’s apology, he put his hand down, his face calmed down, said ‘okay’ and drove off.
Did I mention I was annoyed already? and I started cribbing and asked my husband why he apologized especially when that person was clearly arrogant and about to start a war over nothing.
‘I did make a mistake and if encourage and fuel his anger further we will all leave with a very bad and foul mood and there was no one who is going to benefit from that. What is the point in engaging in an argument when there is perfect choice to end it by not succumbing to our ego?’
Honestly I was still annoyed, but in time his approach made sense.
Now when opportunity presents itself, I consciously look for amicable way out. The only way I can achieve that is by being level-headed and being able to calm down.
I thought it is not good to suppress anger and we have to learn to let it out in constructive ways. Instead, what if we don’t get anger at all? Sounds wonderful isn’t it? Is it possible though? That is for you to figure it out