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Whose fault is it? Answer in the end…

Before I became a mom, whenever I read about some accidents because mom had looked away for a sec – – I used to assert myself that I should constantly watch over baby and ensure nothing happens. If you read the comments on such articles there will definitely be some nasty comments about ‘what was mom doing abandoning the child, I never used to leave my child alone and didn’t I manage on my own?’ Although I knew that was totally judgmental, I would make a mental note to be cautious.

Now that I am actually a mom, I realized that I am also a human who need to do human things like pee, poop (sorry for TMI), drink water, eat and do million other things like cook, clean, laundry, vessels washing, pumping, washing bottles, brush teeth and if time allows bathe, comb hair etc.

Eventually I started to wonder why the commenters do not realize that.

How easy it to judge another person and especially if it is about a mom, right about everyone would have a opinion, mostly bad and judgmental.

And jump right away to conclusions and then certify that ‘I would have never done that’ . Why would someone’s mistake create a platform for us to assert our parenting skills? No answer to that logic!

It is not just about accidents for kids, even when kids grow up and make mistakes, it is surprisingly mom’s fault – the comments that generously flows would be – ‘oh why didn’t x’s mom teach them that ? It is her fault x grew up like this’

I wish we can be more supportive and less judgmental about moms or parents in general and re-train our mind to be open-minded.

Next time you hear about something frame the following questions:

  • are you okay ? You must have been upset when that occurred? .. do you need a hug???
  • is your child or family okay ? Do you need help during recovery?
    Or just
  • We are here for you if you need us!

And the answer is – sometimes or lot of times – it is no ones fault!!
Just find ways to make things better and keep improvising.

1 Comment

  1. jee

    Very good post. It is easy to be judgemental but take a minute to realize the situation the mom would have been in. It is never right to judge ones’ parenting skills.

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